How to deal with ungrateful users | How to spot a user

People are fickle. They love you today and hate you tomorrow. I’m great because I decide I am, not because “they” say I am. As are you. Avoid those who attach your validation to contingencies or hurdles they place in front of you. Stay away from those who love you conditionally. If done consistently you’ll rid yourself of many ungrateful users in this lifetime.

You know it’s crazy. You can do 100 things for a person and they’ll remember the one thing you didn’t do. Say yes 100 times they’ll forget about it and fall out with you the instant you refuse 1 request. People kill me with their entitlement. Avoid those who feel like just because you’ve done a thing, you must continue to do that same thing to be in their lives. We often talk so badly about users. And then perpetuate behaviors that make us useful to those types.

When we get into family and relationship structures that exhaust us with obligations that we would otherwise not be responsible for fulfilling it becomes easy to consider ourselves victims. And at times we are, but many times not so much. Most users aren’t as aggressive as we’ve been taught they are. They’re usually opportunists. They just make use of a persons good nature or need for acceptance. There are those who would pay any price to be loved. People who don’t even realize that that’s what they’re doing. Purchasing acceptance. Through gifts. Through favors. And through saying yes to a myriad things they should should be saying no to. In that case they aren’t victims. Your experience is the price you pay for lacking judgement and being unaware if yourself and others.


Many ungrateful users are so self absorbed they when you finally say no or require something of them in exchange they try to flip it like their the ones who’ve been giving. They act as if in requiring anything from them back or just saying no is somehow mistreating them.

Don’t let no ungrateful son of a bitch guilt you into a life of servitude. Some people will try to use emotions and sympathy to try and bind you. Other will dangle their allegiance like an award.

Other will make use of the nature of conflict avoidance many of us have by using intimidation. They may also play on your good nature to build in your mind a responsibility to take care of them and all their requests.


Whatever tactic they use don’t submit. And if you have in the past don’t convince yourself that you are doing an absurd amount things for someone because you want to when it’s really because they want you to. Don’t submit to your fear of loneliness. Breaking bonds can be a scary but very necessary evil…….continued


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